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Getting Over Oneself

Hello guys and gals,

Today is the first day of the rest of your life… or so the proverbially mysterious ‘they’ would say. Freaking own it and stop:

1) whining all the time
2) feeling sorry for yourself
3) expecting others to feel sorry for you
4) expecting others to make your dreams come true
5) giving up
6) judging everyone else
7) envying everyone else
8) being lazy

I’ve been all of these things. I continue to be and do these things because I’m not perfect. But my God do I wish I could stop completely, and I strive to stop them every day. Why? Because I don’t want to be a miserable person, and whether you admit it to yourself or not, if most or all of the items of that list describe you or your daily thoughts/actions, you are probably a miserable person. You may not feel miserable, but I would be willing to bet that you’re miserable to be around.

If most or all of those things describe you, you’re the kind of person I’ve been working on minimizing contact with.

I am doing my best to clean my well, not poison it with the company that I keep.

My old boss, a woman who I did not always agree with but who gave me many opportunities (and laughs) and will always be someone I consider a friend, posted this little gem on Facebook the other day…


I have been giving this a lot of thought and I am going to continue to give it thought until I get better and, in fact, not sweating the small stuff. I need help with not sweating the small stuff. I need help with not sweating the big stuff, as well. We are not masters of any universe…not even our own. We can only control so much.

As a self-diagnosed (slowly) recovering control freak, coming to terms with this is a daily journey. I genuinely believe that God has been helping me with it, even when I haven’t been wise enough to say to myself, “You know what? This is too big for me. I’m out of my league. It’ll work out, and if it doesn’t, it will still be okay.”

That is the attitude I am trying to have about many important things at the moment:

1) My impending marriage and new married life with Matt
2) My lack of permanent employment, as of yet
3) My student loan and car debt
4) The success or failure of the efforts made toward my dream of being an author – namely, my book
5) Interpersonal relationships

I am sure there are more but what’s the point of counting them out if I am trying not to “sweat” them?

What is life if not uncertain? If battling uncertainty, and sometimes downright heartache/sorrow/grief/anger/jealousy, is the price that I must pay for the air in my lungs, sun on my skin, food in my stomach, God in my heart, and loved ones by my side…well, if that’s all I have to sacrifice, I’m a lucky woman.

Today has been a hard day. I will be taking it out on my brother’s punching bag when I get home and then channeling my myriad of feelings into a solid writing session tonight. On a light note, I found this on Facebook somewhere…


And to all, a good night!

-C.F. Boehlke



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